My name is Regis Pfullbin -- I can't hold another byte,
Long-term memory, Alzheimerish, at best,

The serial ports are all turning parallel,
Read-only gigs tattooed upon my chest,

Someone just unplugged my Mightysoft mouse,
My keyboard is linked back-to-back,

ROM me over in the clover, if you please, Ms. Bit,
Could Viagra maybe help me in the sack?

My peripheral is shrinking, getting smaller, day by day,
Like a Jones plug, it's larger on one side,

It might be time to upgrade my drum memory,
The antique hardware that my friends deride,

We don't see many switch hitters nowadays,
AC/DC -- a descriptive term we lack,

If my chips get any faster -- maybe Pantie-yumm Five,
'Twill give nostalgia for my teens -- UNIVAC,

by D. Edgar Murray